And the award for String of the Year goes to.....

At a bumper turn-out for the annual Xmas curry, the usual suspects descended on the Himalaya and duely sampled their fine wares. As with most years we were joined by friends from the across the county, Seymour entertained with his musical arse and the first awards of the festive season were handed out.
Sadly this year saw the disgraceful use of tactical, and frankly irregular voting patterns that deprived argubly one of the finest strings, since 'that gull', the title of String of the Year. The marsh warbler had been the connoisseur's choice for the title following the withdrawl of the Kenfig bobolink, but in the end our very own Clive pipped the lot to the title with his superb rough-legged buzzard. Clive has been gunning for the title for some years and so it was with great pleasure that Clive took the cup for 2010. Clive's good humour in accepting the award was a credit to both himself and to Cardiff birding (a lesson that should be noted for the more humourless amongst you). His acceptance speech, although littered with considerable profanity was on the whole as full of shit as his rough-legged buzzard and was only really marred by Seymour's arse squeaks, Dogger passing out and crys of fix by all the rest of us. Either way, well done Clive.
Jeff 'the lens' Slocombe won the prize for Best Photographer of the Year prompting Mr Huffy-Pants Hinton to break away and form his own blog in the most childish moment of the evening. Jeff won the 'Einstein' and hopes to put this to good use next year when looking at terns at Eggy Nun. In an act of unparalled generosity, Jeff's acceptance speech (which was frankly shit on the whole), included the offer of lending the 'Einstein' to Barry next time he goes ringing. Richard Smith simply sulked for the remainder of the evening and called Jeff names behind his back which was pathetic but fair. I thought calling Jeff a 'massive gay boy' was going a bit far, but what can you do when you look like that bloke without the beard from Abba and you think playing the banjo is grown-up.
This year saw the first award of Murray the Pewter Pigeon for services to bird conservation in Glamorgan. Winning Murray is no mean feat and the competion for what is arguably one of the top prizes in birding was fierce. In the end it came down to two main contenders, and with little to seperate them in terms of waistbands the prize was decided by a pieathon. After 17 hours of continuous pie consumption, the freak insertion of a Cheese and Onion pastie resulted in a minor riot at Greggs and both competitors withdrew in protest at the attempted poisoning by a non-meat realated pastry encompassed snack. In the end we simply gave the award to everyone present at the illegal and disgusting flushing of the bobolink at Eglwys Nunydd. Any suggestion that the bobolink was flushed to death by 'those Cardiff bastards', was quickly dispelled when the bird was re-found at Kenfig Pool a few days later by Frank Dobson, a well known local bird finder of limited intelligence and disgusting personal hygiene. The county recorder, Idi Amin Gilmore was on hand to accept the award and gave a moving speech. With barely a dry eye amongst the birders sat in close proximity to Seymour, the Dogger had to be revivied with the use of one of Frank's socks and a final toast to absent friends brought the house down. Murray will be up for grabs next year so good luck.
Sidney Parsons won the award for best bird of the year. The Randal Trophy was presented and Sid's speech was translated by Jeff. Luckily Jeff managed to garner that Sid's 2010 had been a monumental year for him. Not only has Sid failed to find a yellow-browed warbler in 2010 but the realisation that the new coalition government might actually force him into getting a proper job has made all his hair fall out. Thankfully the Randal Trophy is large enough to cover his head and keep him dry if it rains on his new paper round. Well done Sid, we'll polish the cup and get it engraved for you. Then we'll give it to someone that actually appreciates it.

That just about wraps up the 2010 awards. A few more are yet to be decided but I'm sure we'll think of an excuse to wind someone up over Xmas (we usually do). Merry Xmas everyone.